Trying To Be

I'm not a stranger to myself
I'm just trying to be

To let someone else
Know me
The way I tried and lost

Though I know myself
Enough
I wait for someone
To ask me who are you?

I wait for someone to
Answer that question too

I'm not a stranger to myself
I'm just trying to be

For someone to tell me
The shrill in my voice
And the black in my eyes

I also wait for someone
To show me the marks on my face

To reflect the imperfect pieces
Of myself
With utmost honesty

No!
I'm not a stranger to myself
I'm just trying to be

People come and go
And tell me something new
Every time they do

They tell me how mean I am
Or how ugly I am
They also teach me
How I could hate myself

But they ain't aware
I have self love

I'm not a stranger to myself
I'm just trying to be

It is a dream
Honestly
Someone telling me who I am
And not adding a pun to it

Or may be the flavour they like
Or maybe their kind of irony

But dreams come true
Often
And when they do
People tell you
Who are you

I'm not a stranger to myself
I'm just trying to be

I know!
But they told me
Some of them

I'm a mess
And cheap...Easily wooed

I love deeply
And laugh shyly

I hide those parts of me
From myself
That others know are imperfect

They told me
I lie to myself
And that is true

I'm not a stranger to myself
I'm just trying to be

And honestly
I don't really disagree!

x

मेरी चौखट आज रंगीन है- भाग 2

अच्छा लगता है ना
कभी-कभी रूठ जाना
और नाराज़ होकर
एक कोने में बैठ जाना
इस इंतज़ार में
कि एक फ़ोन आएगा
तुम्हें मनाने के लिए

ना जाने कितनी ही बार
ऐसे ही रूठकर मैं
फ़ोन के इंतज़ार में बैठी हूँ
बिलकुल आज की तरह
पर तुम हो कि
अपना अल्हड़पना छोड़ते ही नहीं
कभी दिनों, कभी हफ्तों
तो कभी महीनों बाद
एक फ़ोन लगाते हो
और कहते हो..
कि जल्दी आऊंगा

पर इस बार
ना तुम्हारा फ़ोन आया
ना ही तुम
ना जाने कब से बैठी हूँ
यूँ ही रूठकर
चलो अब बस भी करो न..
अब थक गई हूँ मैं
तुम्हें पता है..
वो रंगोली अब भी वहीं है
मेरी चौखट को रंगीन बनाती हुई 
सब कहते हैं उसे मिटा देने को
पर मुझे पता है
कि तुम ज़रूर आओगे

अब आ भी जाओ!!

मेरी चौखट आज रंगीन है

मेरी चौखट आज रंगीन है
सुबह से बेचैन थी मैं..
क्या करती
तुम आने वाले हो
ये खबर सुनकर
ख़ुशी का ठिकाना ही न रहा
रंग बटोरने लगी
नीले पीले गुलाबी नारंगी
ये रंगोली तुम्हारे लिए ही
बनायी थी
बस अब आना रहा गया है
तुम्हारा
तुम आओगे न?
तुमने वादा किया था मुझसे..
हाँ! मुझे मालूम है तुम आओगे
पर फिर..
सब मान क्यों नहीं रहे?
सब क्यों कहते है तुम नहीं आओगे?
अरे! ऐसे कैसे
बॉर्डर पर ही तो गए थे
तुम्हारा आना तो तय ही था
मैं कहती थी ना तुम्हें
इतना पागलपन सही नहीं है
किसी दिन ले डूबेगी तुम्हें
अपनी माँ से इतना प्यार
कौन करता है भला!
तुम्हारी माँ भी तो फिक्र नहीं
करती तुम्हारी
और सिर्फ तुम्हारी ही क्यों
ना जाने कितने ही बेटे है उसके
सबको यूँ अपनी गोद में सुलाती है
और घर ही नहीं आने देती
और बदले में..
बदले में देती है
गुरुर..गर्व
क्या करूँ मैं इनका
जब तुम ही नहीं हो
चलो अब बातें बहुत हुई
अब जल्दी घर आ जाओ
तुम्हारी रंगोली
और तुम्हारी बीवी
इंतज़ार कर रही है तुम्हारा
तुम्हें अपनी माँ कि गोद से
उठना ही होगा
नहीं तो मैं नाराज़
हो जाऊँगी!!

A Dose of Entertainment Once in a While Does no Harm to Anyone Ever!!

Bollywood..the word itself is an emotion. There is simply no one who in one way or the other, isn’t inspired by it. Bollywood is not just about films, film stars, stories or glamour. Some part of this industry is definitely a part of every Indian. 

Moreover, movies are a mirror of the society we live in. It would not be wrong to say that movies and society are directly proportional to each other. Either the movies show what happens in the society, or the society follows what is shown in movies. Since they play such influential roles in our lives, it is important that we stay aware about them.

Here are some movies of 2019 that must be on everyone’s watch list.

Kesari

Drama/Action 

Credit: Wikipedia

The epic battle of Saragarhi and in it the character of Ishar singh, portrayed very realistically by Akshay Kumar is what this movie is about. The story is about the newly made Sikh regiment of the British Indian Army and how it fought one of the greatest and bravest battles in the history of India. Unable to follow the orders of the British government, Ishar Singh is sent to Saragarhi where 20 other Sikh soldiers await him. It is them whom he leads in a battle against 10,000 Afghans. Thus, this battle of the odds is worth giving a watch. Pride and courage runs in the blood of every Indian, we just don’t remind ourselves of it. This movie is a chance to pay homage to all those brave hearts that fought against the odds. 

Photograph

Drama/Romance

Credit: BookmyShow

Starring Nawazuddiniqui and Sanya Malhotra in the lead roles, Photograph is an extra ordinary story in a world full of ordinary people. Rafi (Nawazuddin) is a struggling street photographer who is frustrated by his grandmother, who is constantly pressurizing him to get married. As a solution, he convinces a stranger (Miloni aka Sanya) who is his customer, to pose as his fiancé. Their journey begins when he shows this photograph to his grandmother and she asks him to get her home. The girl surprisingly agrees to it and from here on, a strange but beautiful bond between two people who are culturally and economically like the earth and the sky, begins. 

Mere Pyare Prime Minister

Drama/Social

Credit: Cinestaan

Kanhu is an eight-year old boy who lives in a Mumbai slum with his mother and three siblings. He decides to write a letter to the Prime Minister of India after his mother is raped. The story is a soulful mix of beautiful human emotions and their ups and downs. Nobody should miss this beautiful portrayal of a mother-son relationship and how it evolves with time and according to situations.

Romeo Akbar Walter

Drama/ Thriller

Credit: Cinestaan

An ode to all those masked men who never reveal their identities but willingly enter the enemy land for their country, Romeo Akbar Walter is based upon the life of such a man, an Indian spy- Ravindra Kaushik who crossed the border during the 1971 war and gathered crucial information for the nation. The three names in the title are the ones adorned by John Abraham (in the role of Ravindra Kaushik) as a spy for RAW. It is a striking story about this man, and reminds us of thousands of others who sacrifice everything they have in life for the sake of their motherland. I think every Indian who watches the movie, would be able to see himself as that spy on the screen and feel what he must have felt.

Kalank

Drama/Romance

Credit: Moviehungama

A period drama set in the 1940s Pakistan, the movie features a love story at the time of partition. Described as “a story of turbulent relationships and eternal love” by Karan Johar, this story could be one of his best works. Moreover, the touch of ‘Pakistan during partition’ adds to the excitement. And though Karan Johar’s films ARE a little over the top, but a love story is still his forte. Therefore, the movie is definitely worth giving a watch.